If we can learn anything from the Ned Fulmer and Adam Levine drama, it’s that ‘Wife Guys’ should *not* be a thing

How many famous “Wife Guy” cheating scandals will it take for men to stop building their entire brands around monogamy, only to then not follow through? In the past month alone, two well-known men have admitted to not staying faithful to their spouses. Typically, we’re used to seeing these kinds of headlines – in fact, at this point, we’ve become almost immune to celebrity cheating allegations.

Don’t get me wrong, there’s nothing wrong with being married and wanting to share your happiness with the rest of the world. What’s troubling is that some famous men fail to understand that by doing so constantly (whether it’s through songs, videos or social media), they turn it into an entire brand.

Think about it – when someone like Adam Levine dedicates his entire career to releasing romantic songs and tops it off with social media posts showcasing him being a family man and a loving husband, it’s hard not to think of it as a strategy. And when cheating allegations coming from an Instagram model (@sumnerstroh) started making rounds on the internet, many didn’t immediately believe it and instead rushed to accuse the woman of playing the “victim.” So it’s no wonder it caused a bit of a stir when Levine admitted to having “crossed a line.” [You can read his full statement in response to the allegations here.]

Then you have Ned Fulmer, a now-former member of the “Try Guys” YouTube squad, who spent years practically advertising his marriage at any given opportunity. Seriously, there are literal YouTube compilations of all the times he had said “my wife” in a video. Heck, even his Instagram bio reads “(aka @arielmfulmer’s Husband).”

“Women have been historically characterised as wives for centuries. So why do we praise ‘Wife Guys?’”

Just a few days ago, the news broke that Ned had cheated on his wife of 10 years with a coworker, which he later described as a “consensual workplace relationship.” And although some people won’t have had a clue about who Ned was before this scandal, one thing became abundantly clear – it didn’t really matter, we were all invested in the drama anyway. When someone like Levine or Fulmer cheats, it echoes way beyond the standard “cheating is bad” narrative.

My main issue with this whole thing is that “Wife Guys”– before they’re revealed to have cheated on their partner, obvs – are pretty much worshipped by society. Why is that? It sounds ridiculous, but I’ve been there myself. As someone who’s been cheated on, I used to put guys like Ned Fulmer on a pedestal and wonder if I would ever be lucky enough to meet a man like him.

I used to think of men like Ned as those “who would never” and “are not the type to cheat.” And I wasn’t the only one who idolised them simply because they seemed like “the loyal husband type.” I’d argue that most of Ned’s followers were almost “hooked” on the idea of him being a famous, family guy.

Then you also have TikTok guys who tend to go viral for changing their baby’s diaper or pampering their wives – yet again, essentially for advertising their ability to be exemplary husbands. But when a woman does something similar, it’s not seen as anything out of the ordinary. After all, what’s so unusual and unique about being a wife? Women have been historically characterised as wives for centuries. So why do we praise “Wife Guys”?

I believe that most of the time, we do so with reassurance and hope. When you’re someone who’s previously experienced infidelity first-hand, you can’t help but get a sense of hope whenever you come across someone like Ned (pre-cheating, of course). It’s only natural that you end up rooting for them and their marriage. And it’s even more natural to feel the shock that follows when you find out that they ended up doing the very thing that hurt you in the first place, undoing everything that you’ve admired them for.

And who could blame you? The problem is that if men like Ned, knowing what they’re loved for, turn “being married” into a form of branding, they don’t expect, that such branding comes with consequences, which is exactly why the whole “Wife Guy” phenomenon has turned into such a big internet fiasco.

That’s also not to say that we, as women, should abandon all hope of finding a loyal partner, nor should we question our current romantic relationships. In fact, by doing so, we would be giving men like Ned Fulmer and Adam Levine the power to affect our personal lives. What we need to do is to stop helping them with their branding by glamorising them in the first place. But like any other celebrity cheating scandals, the hype around these stories will die down, and before we know it, we’ll be talking about the next big drama.

My only hope is that even once this happens, men with a platform will still consider the consequences of branding themselves as a “Wife Guy” before going against their advertised morals.